However it just makes me have such a gut feeling when there's a sense of replacement. As if you meant nothing. It drives me insane. All I can think of is getting a job, getting coursework done and moving on and finding people who matter. So far I've done half my coursework. And I have been with school friends who have made me feel so good these past few days. But it's different when you're with your close friends. I only really care about Cherise the most. I just really hope I haven't lost her. I can deal with other losses. I don't blame the new guy at all! I just find it always makes me feel like I don't matter. Everytime something pops up on facebook. Things I used to do.
It's weird how things change but in a way I'm happy for the change. I can focus on a lot more things than making my friendships work with people who aren't achieving. And in a way I'm focusing more on myself so that I can get to the places I want instead of rooting for other peoples goals. I'm gonna make the best of myself. And true friends will be there throughout the journey without being negative. I find that jealousy and guilt can be easily related in times like these.
